Friday, September 27, 2013


'mistake' is when things are done and it turns out wrongly, far from what you think it should be

And mistake is to drag yourself into the ' mistake'. And i am glad it isnt even close.

Too confusing? My intention definitely. As if you don't like being confused.

Yes, YOU.

Monday, September 23, 2013

Hari panas. Bukan summer.

Internet at the workplace is like real hazab. Maxis is the worse. Could not even make a call without having to stand next to the window. Kalau orang tengok dari bawah office macam pempuan  bercakap dengan bopren  on the phone, but this perempuan sudah ready to declare war with maxis. Nak cakap tepon je then i have to menyusup to these cubicles, finding a spot where barely a bar appears. It's getting worst la, hari tu dah pakat mengamuk, ni jadi balik. Stresss hoi. Celcom is nothing better, it is okay okay during daylight but coming home, sama jugak. Kalau dapat, dapat la. Nak loading his skype video pun bercinta. Oh hari ni gatal tangan nak update ios, then thinking i have jail broken mine, tak jadi.

Workload has been nothing but a nitemare. Got to speed a bit with the report writing coz some of the kids are going away for their athletic events god knows where. Keying marks here and there, and hunting those who are not taking those quizzes yet. Aku tak paham betul kids nowadays, like they care less if they take the exam or not. And what's more when it comes to quizzes. As what i remembered clearly back in my uni years, i would be the one going crazy chasing the lecturers for the quizzes, and even begged if it past the given date. Gelabah tak hingat. Ke aku je yang over gelabah? Reminded me that i cried at the phone booth talking to mom, ngadu  kes dr richard salah calculate markah and did not award the supposed correct answers. Esok pagi pagi dah bertunggu tangga kat depan bilik dr richard, his note and the answer paper in my hand. I fought for my right. And showed him his note and the part where he missed out my answers, and no further questions asked, i got the marks! The aftermath feeling, kerenyih tak ingat and donia ini ana yang punya..gituu..!. How i wish my kids would have the same feeling of struggle ness, bukan tunggu the lecturer chase after them for their OWN marks.

How i wish.

Something happened at the office today, i want to lash it out here but tak larat pulak nak type. Type lembab, but kalau verbal bercerita laju wooo. It just that from this morning incident, i learnt that..

If you are a leader, old or new, somehow in order to get things done, you can't just simply do it your way and terms alone. You are working with other human, try to respect their choice as well. Tak de salah ya kalau kita jaga hati anak buah, bukan just bagi arahan like your orders do not affect others.

Tapi tulah, not everybody is born a leader. You can lead but you are no leader. Sorry.

How what have

Boring mode is one so tag it is!!

Ten how's
1. How did you get your scar?
Heel stuck in a pavement hole and stumble flat, knee first. Bruised knee, bruised ego. ;( did you celebrate your last birthday?
Singapore. With drama in between. are you feeling at this moment?
Missing someone. Hungry. Bored hence the tag. And missing someone. There i said it twice.

4. How did your night go last nite?
Just like any regular nights, fall asleep not knowing when i fell asleep. Woke up with the sound of Humphrey meowing loudly on the bed. And fall asleep again. Bahahhaa..! Crazy sleeping pattern.

5. How did you do in high school?
Never made any visit to the disciplinary unit, so yeahhhh i was a good girl. Oh you asking my academic now? Errr..on the lighter note...ermm..

6. How did you get a shirt you are wearing?
Not wearing any shirt. I mean, wearing a sundress now. Got that from H&M, impulse buying more likely coz it ends up being a baju tido

7. How often do you see your best friends?
Sadly, not so often. Time's a killer.

8. How much money did you spend last month?
Hmm.. How much eh? Not much laaa. Light light shopping onlyyy meh! But i spent much much more on fuel than i did on the other stuffs. Pegi kl every week woo!

9. How old do you want to be when you get married?
When it is the Time, then that is how old i want it to be, or He above wants it to be.

10. How old will you be in your next birthday?
Not telling!! But it will hard job blowin' those candles!

Nine what's
1. Your mother's name?
Definitely different from yours

2. What did you do last weekend?
Working on saturday , and menjadi malas on sunday. Malas malas dan malas. Mari menjadi sloth

3. What is the most important part of your life?
Being happy sincerely, not just faking it in time.

4. What would you rather be doing?
Escaping somewhere and waking up with the sound of the ocean. Oceee berangan la kau nak beach getaway sangat kan kalau kerja berlambak kat opis. But seriously, i just need my cuti. I am tepu otak at the moment.

5. What did you last cry over?
I was so mad at someone this morning i was quevering and ready to burst into tears. Menangis geram.  Vongek.

6. What always makes you better when you are upset?
Tido. Kaw kaw tido. 

7. What is the most important thing you look for in a significant other?
Being sincere. Coz i am.

8. What are you worried about?
Uncertainty. Like no matter how much i pissed off at things or someone, a minute later i ll be worrying bout the consequences like there's no tomorrow. It worries me that i worry too much, sometimes.

9. What did you have for breakfast?
Apa eh? Lupa. Ha nasi kosong with ayam sambal and nescafe ais. Wajibulqunnah.

Eight have you-s
1. Have you ever liked someone who had a girlfriend?
Pitifully, yes. 

2. Have you ever had your heart broken?
Yes. But for every heart breaks, you gain respect on yourself. Think it's easy? No, only strong mind will do.

3. Have you ever been out of the country?
Legally yes.

4. Have you ever done something outrageously dumb?
Yes, was in a relationship doomed from the beginning. But my silly mind could not think straight. And when it's over, it was a relief.

5. Have you ever been back stabbed by a friend?
Not as far as im concern. Please please no in the near future.

6. Question 6 is a sexually loaded q, but the answer to the q is no, and who knows. Hahahhah. Skip!

7. Have you ever dated someone younger than you?

8. Have you ever read an entire book in one day?
Can.. Why cannot meh?

Sunday, September 15, 2013

What if

If we're not meant to be
Why did this spark ignite
They say this is wrong
Then why do i know it's right

What if this breaks us
What if this separates us now
What if they never stop
Tearing us apart

If it's just you and me
Can we keep burning bright
Trying to stay strong
And not giving up the fight

What if this breaks us
What if we lose our way somehow
I know we can't give up
Let this fall apart

Just keep holding on to this
Never letting go
I won't let you go
Just keep holding on to Him
Never letting go

Nothing will break us
We'll find our way somehow
I know we won't give up
We 'll go back to the start

(what if, paperplane pursuit)

I've been listening to this number quite often now. At first thinking it was an international artist, then only to realise that it is our homegrown band, paperplane pursuit. Fall in love with this number instantly. The melody, the wordings. Awesomeness.

What if you really know what to do..

Wednesday, September 04, 2013


Hellooo beautiful people. And so i am back. From nowhere. Just terkena penyakit malas melampau and the hassle to upload pixies made it so hard to get back in track. Tahap gila malas. Ke malas gila? I guess i am not so much a storyteller these days. Oh I did have 'amazing' life and I got loads of 'amazing' stories, but don't you think that some stories are better left unshared?

Takpe, nak load semua stories tu dalam plastik sampah, campak ke lombong and start fresh.

Okay nak start kat mana? Raya story? Raya was okay, definitely better than I thought. That first day, macam biasa the big gathering at tok ad's crib, sesi gosip (sempatttt!) and definitely the camwhoring session. Makan ketupat skit, rendang skit, and tok had the catering done for the day.

Then the rest of the day was spent in SP. Makteh requested mama to cook mee kuah, as she is planning to do makan makan for her hajj going-away. I was mostly upstairs, didnt go down much as makteh got her colleagues over and marilah jadi anak dara pemalu (ok .sedap lepak atas coz i was in sweatpant and shirt most of the time. Gila raya kedua attire. Bibik lagi cun. Ok i was plain lazy. And seriously in no mood to mingle.)

Raya ke empat dah balik kuantan. Cool kan? Orang raya seminggu, aku dah balik invigilate exam. Yawnnn!

Dah la . Tuh je cerita raya. I get the pixies soon. Am still in my raya munching mode, so pleasee tell if there are any good rendang open houses that i can crash. Ba ha ha!

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just a normal average jane who loves to sleep n write whatever comes across her mind.

of the gibberish ramblings and the thoughtless thought